Thank you, Rainbow Kids

     Ever feel you owe a debt of gratitude to someone? That's how I feel about Rainbow Kids. Years ago, when we first began to discuss adoption, I had a strong sense that our next child would not be the healthy, white newborn so coveted by couples hoping to adopt (and this implies no judgement - we just knew those babies would find families, and we felt called in another direction). We had three children who happened to have been born healthy, but we knew they could have been born with any variety of issues or disabilities, and they'd still have been our beloved children. Somehow, I knew our child would be waiting due to a medical issue, and once we learned how much harder it is for a little boy, particularly with any health issues, to find a family, we knew our next child would be a boy. But where on earth would he be, and how would we find him?

      Our local agency only placed healthy infants, but our social worker referred us to Children's Home Society and Family Services of Minnesota, where the Korean waiting child coordinator directed us to the Rainbow Kids photolisting. There, we were stunned to see hundreds of children listed, from countries throughout the world, with issues as mild as missing fingers and as severe as serious heart issues. All beautiful, all precious in His sight, all deserving of families.

     There, we found our beautiful Musician, and fell in love with his sweet face even before we understood his special need or had a homestudy completed. How excited we were when we could finally be matched, and while we waited for his homecoming, we fell in love with the Wrestler, also on Rainbow Kids. Later, our Littlest would be listed there as well.

     Martha Osborne, the founder of Rainbow Kids, has an incredible heart for orphan care and adoption, and she's put together a beautiful video highlighting some of the amazing Rainbow Kids who are home with their forever families now. Take a moment to watch and be blessed. Then check out the adoption stories,  and ask yourself: "Is there a Rainbow Kid waiting for me?"

Giving thanks, and
Trusting in Him,
Aimee

Pure Yumminess - a GFDF Chocolate Cake

            We had a lovely birthday celebration with Nanny (my mom) and are back into the swing of school – but what fun it was to have a day of birthday school with my helper! So much baking and writing and drawing!

We thought you might enjoy trying the cake that got rave reviews that night. The original recipe is from Elizabeth Barbone’s Easy Gluten Free Baking (a GREAT book – everything in it turns out so well!), but I’ve adapted it to make it gluten, dairy and corn free by changing the liquids, and substituting for the corn starch and baking powder (did you know baking powder contains corn? I've adjusted the ingredients here, but if you'd like to make your own corn-free baking powder, simply mix 1 t cream of tartar with 1/2 t baking soda).

 Before baking, I take out a bit of this batter to make myself a few cupcakes before I pour the rest into the pan. I frost the family's cake, while I enjoy my babycakes with strawberries. If you can find a corn-free powdered sugar, the frosting could be made corn-free as well.

 Classic Chocolate Cake (gluten, dairy and corn free)

1 ¾ cups gluten free flour mixture
1 cup unsweetened GF cocoa powder
1 t. cream of tartar
2 t baking soda
1 t salt
1 ½ t xanthan gum
2 c granulated sugar

2 large eggs

1 cup non-dairy milk (I like Silk coconut milk)
½ c canola oil
2 t GF, CF vanilla
1 c very hot water

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease a 9x13 pan, or line 24 muffin cups with paper liners. In a large bowl, mix together the dry ingredients. Add eggs, milk, oil and vanilla and beat for 2 minutes at medium speed. Scrape down bowl, and add hot water and mix until blended. Pour batter into prepared pan(s) and bake. For a 9x13 pan, the cake should bake about 45 minutes; for cupcakes, 18-20. I very, very, slightly underbaked mine – a toothpick was almost clean after being inserted into the center – and the cake seemed a little moist on top after it cooled. However, it resulted in the most lovely, moist cake, and people asked repeatedly whether it was really gluten free.

Chocolate Frosting (dairy and gluten free, but not corn free)

3 T Spectrum Shortening (pure pressed palm oil)
1 lb confectioners sugar
3 T cocoa powder
3T non-dairy milk, plus more as needed
1 T GF vanilla

Blend the shortening, sugar and cocoa powder until it’s well mixed. Add the liquid and vanilla, and blend well. Add more liquid, a T at a time, continuing to blend well, until the frosting reaches spreading consistency.

 Happy Eating!

Trusting in Him,

Aimee

Happy Birthday, Nanny!

         Today’s a really special day here. We’re cooking and baking and snapping green beans and drawing and writing, because Nobility is coming to dinner. Actually, my parents are coming to celebrate my mother’s birthday with us, and it’s fun to have a night to honor this wonderful lady who has blessed me throughout my life in so very many ways.

          Years and years ago, it was my mother who introduced me to great books, spreading before me a rich feast of literature. I remember curling up beside her while she read The Wind in the Willows, the Little House books, Charlotte’s Web and countless other favorites.

          It was my mother who introduced me to other cultures, taking me to the Festival of Nations, and sparking a deep interest in how other people live. While she was never big on camping, it was my mom who helped spark a love of nature, with picnics and park outings, lots of time outdoors (and little TV), and a tolerance for the many animals she allowed to dwell with us.

          She indulged my fashion sense with incredible clothes she sewed for me through the years. We were a team: as I got older, I’d pore through Vogue magazines, design wild and wonderful outfits, and find patterns and fabrics to bring them to life. She’d cut and sew for hours – I think she had the harder end of the deal! She taught me to love warm strawberry jam, just off the stove, and homemade bread, fresh from the oven.

          My mother gave me a blueprint for how to deal with the sometimes hazardous activities of boys. Frequently, one of my three brothers or another injured himself, and would holler, “MOM!” She’d call back, “Is it bleeding?”

          If the answer was yes, her next question was, “Does it need stitches?” If the answer was no, we were to carry on.

          The most important thing my mother gave me, though, was an example of deep and abiding faith and lessons in how to live it out. On the wall of our eat-in kitchen was a huge paper sign, a foot tall and perhaps four feet long, advising, “Let Go and Let God.” She meant it, and has always worked hard to follow that advice. She blessed me by seeing that I was involved in Bible studies and youth groups, even though the church we belonged to at the time didn’t offer those things.

          In terms of living her faith, one thing is huge in my mind. At Christmas time, she sought out families in need to bless each year. When I think back on the gifts she chose for each member of the family, the Christmas tree, the clothes, I’m amazed that she and my Dad did this on his teacher’s salary, while still providing wonderfully for all of us. The most powerful part of this, though, was bringing the gifts to the family, one of whom we visited for many years in a row.

          This family made such an impact on my life, when we were supposed to be the ones helping them: there was a single mom and her son, Carl, who had spina bifida and walked with metal crutches, and wore the old-fashioned heavy metal and leather braces used back then. His grandmother also lived with them, and she and his mom were both battling chronic illnesses. Despite this, they had the most cheerful, loving presence, and greeted us each year with packages of homemade cookies to take home with us. It might not have been easy to let others help them, but they were so gracious, and the effect of this was profound.

         She also taught me lessons in forgiveness, and I still have a small heart ornament she gave me after one of our many arguments when I was a teenager. She handed it to me with an apology, and that small thing meant so much that I've cherished the ornament ever since. I’m so grateful to my mom for her faithfulness, and for teaching me many lessons that shaped my future. She hasn’t stopped. She blesses our family regularly with the special relationship she has with each of our children, with her listening and ministering spirit, with her gifts of service and the shopping trips and lunch dates she blesses our kids with. She’s a blessing to many, but we are so very lucky to have her as our very own mother and “Nanny.” This is long, but fitting, so I'm including it all:

¹⁰ A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
¹³ She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her female servants.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
²² She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Proverbs 31: 10-31

            How blessed am I, to have a mom like that? We love you, Mom. Happy Birthday!

Giving thanks, and

Trusting in Him,

Aimee

           

Our Favorite Gluten Free Bread Recipe

        When I first started eating Gluten Free, the thing I missed most was bread – soft, warm from the oven bread that tasted like bread and not Styrofoam or white glue. I tried several recipes, but I ended up frustrated with the amount I’d spent on ingredients and the dismal results. A few years ago, a gluten free bakery opened locally, and sometimes I treated my GF kids and myself to an $8 loaf of bread, but not without great pangs of guilt for spending so much on something so simple. Udi’s bread was a nice option when it became available, but more food restrictions took all of these off of my menu – it was impossible to find a gluten, dairy and corn free bread ready-made.

          Finally, my friend Debbie came to the rescue with a recipe her family uses and loves. The original recipe called for sorghum flour, which you may like (and it may be more nutritious), but it doesn’t agree with me. I’ve replaced it with rice flour in my recipe, and made a few other small adjustments. She makes it in a bread maker, for a 1.5 sized loaf; I make it the old fashioned way, in my Kitchenaid stand mixer. We are so happy with how it turns out.  Perhaps you will like it too?

Our Favorite Gluten Free Bread

1 1/2 cups rice flour (white, brown or a mixture)
1/2 cup millet flour
1/2 cup tapioca STARCH
1/2 cup potato STARCH
2 1/2 tsp xanthum gum
1 1/4 tsp sea salt

1 packet rapid rise yeast OR 2 1/4 tsp
1 1/4 cup very warm water
½ tsp sugar
3 tbsp olive oil
2 tbsp honey (or agave nectar)
1 tsp apple cider vinegar
2 eggs, beaten

Combine yeast, warm water, and sugar, to let the yeast start working.  Mix all other dry ingredients while you wait. When you’ve got a bubbly cup of yeasty water, add to it the oil, honey, vinegar and eggs, and then mix it all into your dry ingredients. Beat for several minutes, until it’s all well blended, and then turn it all out into a well-greased loaf pan. Cover it loosely (I use foil) and set it in a warm place to rise for 30 minutes or so.

Bake in a 350 oven for 45-60 minutes – it slips easily out of my pan, and I check by tapping on the bottom for a hollow sound. It can be tricky to tell when it’s done, but do try not to under bake. The loaf will brown on the outside before the inside is ready, so I tent it with foil after 30 minutes of baking. When it’s done, slip it out of the pan onto a cooling rack, and try to wait until it’s cooled a bit to eat it – bread is always gummy when you cut it too soon.

Wishing you a blessed day, and

Trusting in Him,

Aimee

On Being Image Bearers

          I’ve been thinking and hearing a lot about the term “Image Bearers” lately, but I'd never thought much about how it applied to me. Charlotte Mason taught that children are not merely containers into which we dump information, but rather, persons and image bearers of God. This sounds so simple, and yet can radically change our approach to education and parenting, once we dwell on it. Then recently, I read an Aesop’s Fable that hit me so hard in the head that I could scarcely stop myself from giving a sermon to my 8-year-old. Luckily for him, I managed restraint and am sharing it here instead.

          The fable was about a donkey carrying a sacred image to a temple (only the word donkey wasn’t used, and we’ve had some talks about the appropriateness of this other word in everyday conversation). The donkey was all decked out with “garlands and gorgeous trappings,” and led a grand procession of priests and pages through the streets. As they passed, the watching people reverently bowed or fell to their knees before the image. The donkey, seeing their adoration and assuming it was for him, “became so puffed up with pride and vanity that he halted and started to bray loudly,” bringing a prompt beating from his driver, along with the admonition,

          “Go along with you, you stupid donkey. The honor is not meant for you, but for the image you are carrying.”

          Whoa – that’s where I got hit in the head. Perhaps to understand why reading this affected me so, you need to know that I’d been struggling with something for which I would have liked recognition. Ever have something you’ve worked really, really hard at, and you hoped that someone would notice it? It’s a people-pleasing tendency to be sure, and a desire for outside input to validate worth; not something to be proud of, but there it is and I’m guessing I’m not alone in it.

          And yet here, in this children’s story (which was really written for adults), was a moral for me: “The honor is not meant for you, but for the image you are carrying.”

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” (Gen. 1.27)

          As image bearers, we get the enormous privilege of representing God, and the option of choosing to bring Him glory. Shouldn’t I always hope to be clothed in Him, rather than my own skin and self, so that what shines through is God, and not the “garlands and gorgeous trappings” of external things or achievements? Sometimes, I forget, and want a pat on the back. Sometimes, I forget that privilege of carrying something so precious and profound.

I delight greatly in the LORD; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.

 Isaiah 61: 9-11

          What a crazy honor to be given! We’re not defined by where we came from, what we’ve done, how we look, choices we’ve made or what we’re thinking right now, today. We’re image bearers of God. Wow. I’m hoping to remember the picture of that donkey foolishly braying, the next time I’m longing for an “atta boy,” and praying I might, instead, direct the attention to the image I'm so blessed to carry.

Wishing you a beautiful day, and

Trusting in Him,

Aimee

Bearing With One Another

            In my devotional last night, these words stand out:

          “It requires far more of the restraining love of Christ to love our cousins and neighbors as members of the heavenly family, than to feel the heart warm to our suffering brethren in Tuscany or Madeira. To love the whole church is one thing; to love - that is, to delight in the graces and veil the defects – of the person who misunderstood me and opposed my plans yesterday, whose peculiar infirmaties grate on my most sensitive feelings, or whose natural faults are precisely those from which my natural character revolts is quite another.”

                   -Elizabeth Charles – Daily Strength for Daily Needs 

          I think on this long and hard, about how easy it is to feel deeply for the suffering of the orphan in China or Russia, the persecuted in the underground church, the impoverished or enslaved – and yet how hard, sometimes, to live with those where we are planted.

          There is, perhaps, the clerk at the grocery store more interested in her conversation with a coworker than her customer, the friend whose words have stung, a spouse whose tired spirit needs space to breathe and isn’t intentionally ignoring. There are children with needs – perhaps a whining or bickering – that grate nerves and make edges raw, and there are young people trying to find their own way, sometimes stepping on others in the process.

          Oh, how much easier it is, to love those others from afar, than to love those around me sometimes – how much more of me it requires! Can I listen, nurture, and be patient, instead of judging, snapping angrily or holding a grudge?

          “Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another. If anyone has a complaint against another, even as Christ forgave you, so you must also do. But above all these things, put on love, which is the bond of perfection.”

                             Colossians 3:12-14

          To get rid of the judgment and impatience, I need substitutes – tender mercies, kindness, humility, patience and forgiveness. Strongs defines forgive as to do a favor, show kindness unconditionally, give freely, grant forgiveness, forgive freely. The word is from the same root as charis, “grace”.  Freely forgive – as I have been forgiven, can I forgive? Some hurts are hard to pass over, and yet how much I’ve been forgiven.

          There is more:

          “And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatever you do in word or deeds, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.” Colossians 3:15-17

          Thanksgiving - there it is again! How much better each day, and each relationship, progresses when I look for the gift in each person and each circumstance, taking my eyes off of the far-away and trying to see the beauty in what is around me.

          And so today, let’s start with thanksgiving. The boys near me, they’re playing cards and there’s a bunch of noisemaking and some good-natured bickering. I’m thankful for these growing young men and all they bring to my life; thankful for the husband up early and off to meetings; thankful for the dishes in the sink that meant we enjoyed late-night snacks and a family movie last night. I’m thankful for the little one waiting to play “Sleeping Grump” with me, and for dog lying on my feet. As today progresses, I’ll get irritated, annoyed and grumbly about something and I hope to grab onto thankfulness and forgiveness again, putting on the love and patience of Someone much stronger than me – but one who amazingly, never gives up on me. For this, I am most thankful.

Trusting in Him,

Aimee

When it is so hard to sit still and pay attention

      It is so hard, when you want desperately to pay attention – the story is really interesting –

and yet before long, your eyes glaze over, begin rolling back in your head,

and the yawns start bursting out of you before you can stop them. 

            My children have my empathy on this one: I remember so clearly feeling this way during long lectures in college, or at meetings as a working adult – looking around the room wondering whether I was the only one biting the inside of my cheek, or pinching my wrist under the table in an effort to stay alert and focused.

            To his credit, the little one pictured has made lots of progress. When we first began homeschooling, sitting still for any length of time was nearly impossible; it seemed this child needed either to be moving incessantly, or drooping dramatically, as if he’d suddenly lost all bone mass and muscle-tone. His efforts at concentration seemed directly proportionate to the amount of movement he produced; as I read him a story, he’d sit with one foot raised above his head, toe of his sock in his hand as he jerked the foot back and forth (it makes me giggle to think of trying this at a business meeting). Or perhaps he might rock, or bounce, or wriggle, but it was either movement or drooping, with very little in-between. This doesn’t even touch the pencil losing, book misplacing, wandering tendencies that happened in-between sessions of wiggling.

            This one, more than any other, has encouraged my push further into Charlotte Mason’s methods, and shown me how effective they can be with learners of all types. The first thing both Littlest and I needed to work on together was habit training, and that, I’ve found, is continual – when we master one habit, there’s another to conquer, and we have to keep an eye on the first bad habit to make sure it doesn’t return. So we began to work on replacing things – dawdling with focused work, complaining with cheerful effort, zoning out with small periods of concentration.

            Reading Carrie's blog post this morning, I realize we’re not alone in this, and I thought I’d share some of the things we’ve found most helpful in combating this problem of wiggling and wriggling and having trouble paying attention.

Sleep - getting regular sleep, and lots of it, is a first defense.

Nordic Naturals DHA:  DHA is a wonderful thing for brain function, and when we began using this natural supplement, we saw really dramatic increases in the ability to pay attention, and in language. DHA levels may be lower in kids with ADHD, according to one of the articles below, and I’d posit that kids who were born quite prematurely, like my littlest, didn’t get DHA those last months in utero, and may really benefit from the boost of a supplement.

http://www.lef.org/magazine/mag2008/jan2008_report_dhafishoil_01.htm

http://www.achildgrows.com/2008/01/21/dha-and-adhd-a-connection/

Diet: We’ve found our wiggler to be particularly sensitive to artificial colors and flavors, as well as nitrates and other chemical additives. Keeping the diet simple, natural and full of protein has helped here.

School:

-          Get Moving - we start the day with something kinesthetic – a walk, a bike ride, piano practice. Somehow, piano lessons have had a fantastically unexpected effect of calming my wiggler, who is able to jump into math with far more concentration if he’s practiced his piano first.

-         Short Lessons - Charlotte Mason’s advice of lessons that last no longer than 15 minutes has been a Godsend here. This is a huge break from the traditional and classical paradigms I started with, but it’s just about the amount of time that can be tolerated. I've found much more is learned in a focused 15 minutes, than in an hour of me reading as people zone out.

-     Watch the Dawdling, Switch up the Lessons - if dawdling occurs, a warning is given and we switch to a subject as unlike the first as possible – but we always go back to that first lesson! (We just don’t want to develop the habit of dawdling).  Throughout the day, the types of lessons are switched regularly, so we might go from math to reading, from history to handwriting, with breaks in between for fun group subjects like music or poetry, or for some exercise.

-          Wiggle seat – we looked at expensive therapeutic discs at an online sensory store, but ended up buying an exercise disc that sits on a chair, requiring a small amount of constant movement just to keep level and seated. Too much movement – you’ll tip off, so it’s subtle, not distracting to others, and much less fun to toss around the room than an exercise ball would be!

-         Busy Hands - something small is kept in hand during read-alouds – a small woolen waldorf doll is a favorite listening companion. He is soft, not distracting and he can do cartwheels on the child’s lap without interrupting the story. Somehow, that allows the child’s feet to stay out of the air, my hair, or the book!

-          Drawing – one of my children had trouble attending during read-alouds, but if he could draw while I read, his comprehension increased dramatically. My rule: he had to be drawing something related to the story or historical time period.

-          Me – I need to be available, redirecting, keeping stimuli down, sensing when the eyes are rolling back and moving on to something else.

-          Narration – breaking reading into small chunks, and requiring regular narrations (telling back) of the story has been huge in the practice of paying attention. It’s been a process and lots of work, but it’s been lovely to see the progress. More on that in another post!

Has wiggling and difficulty with attention been an issue in your home or school? Come on in, and let us know what’s worked for you and yours.

Trying to pay attention, and

Trusting in Him,

Aimee